Friday, June 3, 2011

Standardbred Terms & Terminology

Below are some of the terms I use when describing my favorite sport in the world.  These are by no means regulated, or assigned to/with any outfit or organization involved in standardbred racing...

'Bred Head
['bred - head]

a term used to describe a person who thoroughly enjoys standardbred racing; they may possess uniques skills such as excessive drinking, partying, and swearing; these skills are heightened if they actually own a racehorse.

Blind Turtle
[blind - turtle]

a term used for a racehorse that apparently has no clue as to where the finish line is due to lack of speed, but ultimately crosses the wire during the next race's post parade.

Dragged It Through The Hardware Store
[dragged - it - through - the - hardware - store]

a term used to describe a trotter or a pacer that is wearing way too much equipment that normally can be found at places like Lowes or Home Depot.  The dead give-away is the half-cut black tile drain that is apparently used to keep the horse's neck in an upright position to promote proper wind intake and outtake.

Peeler Call
[peeler - call]

a term used to describe the urging of a horse during a race via an extremely loud whistling noise made by the driver.  Usually done down the backstretch when no ORC judge can hear it; sometimes done at all points of the race cause the ORC just doesn't care.

The Cory Hart Syndrome
[cory - hart - syndrome]

an '80's reference used to describe a trainer, driver, or owner who constantly wears dark sunglasses at every racing event (even at night) to portray the fact that he is a high profile individual with copious amounts of cash.  Usually found in and around the track stables commenting about how they nearly purchased Somebeachsomewhere, but couldn't agree on price.  May also be found alone near the betting window when no one else wants to listen to them.

Cold Coffee Supporter
[cold - coffee - supporter]

a term used to describe a person that attends a horse racing event with the intent of only ingesting beer.  Absolutely no gambling is involved and usually by the 9th race the person has lost complete interest in anything remotely related to racing due to outright drunkenness.  Can normally be seen being guided into the back seat of a friend's car and left passed out until the 12th race is complete.

Lucky Strike
[lucky - strike]

the term used when a driver whips under the arch or shaft of the sulky during a race and doesn't get caught.

Shadow Roll
[shadow - roll]

a term used to describe an illegal substance that ultimately is created and smoked out of public view.

A Murphy Blind
[murphy - blind]

a term used for a person who attends a racing event but is completely unknowledgeable with horse racing and it's lingo.  During a race, they can be heard using sentences such as, "Protect your zone!" and "I hope that driver is wearing his seatbelt!"  Other terms used are: jockey; wagon; and pit lane.

Breaking Wind
[breaking - wind]

a term used to describe a horse that continuously breaks stride; can also be used if the horse "dumps out" during a race.

A Fred Astaire
[fred - astaire]

a term used to describe a horse that refuses to stand still in the winner's circle; can be found tap dancing from side to side, swinging his head, and dragging his paddock groom half-way back to the barn.  Usually keeps his stall in complete disarray and if given the chance, will tear your shirt off when you pass by.

Horse Trailer
[horse - trailer]

a term used to describe the previews of an owner's favorite horse related movies.

Racing Action Side Notes:

The Casual Breeze (Race 5) (Race 8) is tonight at Mohawk;  Look at Lukes Sophie, Crys Dream, Extraordinaire, and Peach Martini to continue their successful 2011 campaigns.  In Race 10 watch Dreamfair Eternal battle it out with the Casie Coleman contender, Western Silk!  A fantastic night of harness racing! You can view the entire card here

Good Luck Everyone!!!

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